What is enough?
I am going to be honest. [I think I start a lot of posts this way.] But I don't get enough of Jesus. And it is my own fault most of the time. Now I know that in some proverbial way we can never get enough of Jesus. But spending time in prayer, reading the bible, meditating on his truths? We don't have to. But if I am loving Jesus I will want to. As a mom I often find myself at a loss. A loss of time. A loss of wakefulness. A loss of...shall I even say sanity sometimes?
Let me explain. This is what my mornings look like. Most of the time.
I sleep.
Until I hear the kids stirring or more than stirring...whipping around their rooms in a flurry of clothing, toys, and giggles.
And the other mornings? I wake early. I want time with God. Time in the quiet. AND... one of the kids hears me get up and they get, and they get up the others. And I ask them to go back to their rooms till I get them. And one of the three ends up needed a little more help obeying...
Or this morning. I woke up at 6:05am. No kids stirring this time. I tip-toed downstairs, grabbed my bible and started some much needed coffee. I sit down in my favorite comfy chair AND I notice a pile of puppy vomit on the carpet two feet in front of me. He ate one of the kids socks again and somehow I missed seeing it in the dim-light of dawn. I cannot ignore the vomit. I get up to clean it. I am amazed once again at the number of things that can thwart my time with God. [I did get some good reading in after that, all tinged with the smell of gross doggy stomach contents.]
So I am wondering this morning, how on earth I get enough of Jesus. Or even a little more of Him. When it sometimes feels as though all of life is making it impossible. Ya know? I would love to hear other Mom's thoughts. I've even begun, somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind, to give up.
But I have been thinking about one thing. As a mom I cannot compartmentalize my walk with God. Meaning, if I believe that praying, reading my Bible, and doing "church things" is the only way to know God more and experience him, then by the end of my grueling years as a mom, there might not be any real love of Jesus left. Cause lets be honest, kids and households and life steals your time as a mom. And it seems that nearly everything involving kids is urgent. I have to learn to see God in and amongst my daily moments. Is Jesus somewhere in the vomit? Well maybe he isn't, but he can certainly redeem it. Can I find Jesus in the mountains on my drive to the store, in the small conversations with my kids, in the cooking of dinner or the packing for vacation. Can I find Jesus in decisions made with my husband, hiking, exercising, or doing laundry? He should be in those things, right? He MADE those things, right?
So that is what I am thinking about this morning, as the sun slowly brightens the Wasatch sky. The Wasatch, those mountains that are slowly becoming mine. And as the vomit smell slowly dissipates.
The kids will start stirring soon. I hope I can help them to see Jesus in ALL of life to.
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Saturday, April 7, 2012
Friday, March 23, 2012
My top 10...
Well, we took a brief trip to Winter Park last weekend. And I've spent all week processing through the way-to-many-photos I took. But I think there are some good ones :). I narrowed it down to my top 10 from the trip. Enjoy!
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
All about Esme
This post is in honor of our youngest little girl, who turned two! Wow! You always know two is right around the corner when they master the words, "No mom!" and use them frequently. But other fun things have been emerging in her personality. Like for instance, she seems to be our little peace-keeper. Whenever someone is frustrate, crying or mad (Mommy included) she is the first to give a hug and say, "it ok, I yuve (love) you!"
Here are a few more things we love: Ezzie loves to sing and dance. We went to a University of Utah gymnastics meet last week and she danced in the aisle to the music the entire time. She is usually smiling, or expressing some other vast emotion across her expressive face. She is permanently attached to her tutu right now. She is our most laid back child but also the most stubborn...
We had a blast with all her little friends. Even though the house barely survived...
Happy Birthday Babe!
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